Affairs & Atonements Read online

  “Ashton, please, can we talk about this?”

  “You’ve lost your chance, Christy. I need to go. There are new papers for you to sign. Child custody papers.” He strode angrily towards the door. “And this time I won’t bother delivering them personally to you. You’ll be served.”

  She raced up to the door before he could open it, standing before it and blocking his way.

  “You can’t do that,” she pleaded. “Please Ashton, this is all Ash knows. You’ll uproot everything he believes in. You’ll tear him apart.”

  “It’s because he doesn’t know the entire truth yet!”

  “I’ll tell him. I swear, I will.”

  “It’s too late for that!”

  “I know. And I’m sorry. But please, think of this like his father and not as someone who’s been wronged. I beg of you, Ashton, think of his needs. There is nothing I can do to turn back time. But I will do my best to make up for it. I promise. Please, please don’t take my baby away from me. I beg you.”

  “Get out of the way, Christy.”

  “No, no, no!”

  He grabbed her arm to push her aside, but she braced her back against the door, her fingers clutching onto his shirt. She leaned against him, her head pushing against his chest. He clasped her waist to lift her up and to the side. But she latched onto him tightly, her arms now thrown around his neck, not letting go.

  He danced with her at his spot, trying to free her from him. His body rubbed against hers aggressively, and despite his rage, his body responded to hers, growing hard with an insatiable desire for her.

  Unable to control himself any longer, he pulled her arms from him and pinned her against the door in total ire.

  “Don’t stop me, Christy.” He minced between his teeth, exhaling short rapid breaths. “If you do, you will regret it. I’ll make you regret it.”

  “I don’t care what happens to me,” she cried. “But you can’t take away my child. He’s all I’ve got. You have your family. I have no one. No one but him.”

  Her eyes brimmed with her tears that were pouring out of it, dampening her face. He stepped closer to her until his body leaned heavily against hers.

  It’s not true! He wanted to shake her. She carried his name! She was a part of him!!

  His eyes drew down to her lips and he didn’t realize he was going to meet them with his own until a small rap on the door broke his spell.

  “Mom? Are you alright?” they heard the boy ask from the other side of it.

  Christy looked up at him, her eyes beseeching him.

  He nodded and then stepped away.

  She straightened herself nervously. “Give me a few minutes with him,” she said shakily. “I want to be the one to tell him.”

  He nodded again and opened the door. The boy was standing there with a worried look clouding his face. It cut him deeply to witness it. And he silently swore to himself he would never be the reason or the cause for it.

  *****

  It had been only twenty minutes but it seemed like hours when she finally exited the study, knackered and drained of every emotion.

  She nodded at him. “It’s okay. You can go in now. He knows.”

  He stepped into the room. The boy was staring at him as he walked in. He immediately felt strangely protective of him. How could that be? A short while ago he was a free man. There was an absent wife and no children. And suddenly, he had acquired both. How did a man deal with that? And what of all the warm emotions rising inside him? Did all fathers feel what he was feeling? Did this mean he was going through a rapid evolvement on being a father? Being attached to a child for no cause or reason- except by the single fact that this boy was a part of him? He had given him life. He had come from him.

  “Hi.” He swallowed.

  “Hi,” the boy said quietly.

  Ashton pulled out a chair and sat next to him, unsure of how he should start, although he didn’t have to worry for too long.

  “Is it true?” the boy asked. “Are you my father?”

  “I…uh,” he stammered, looking for the right words. “It looks like it. You look a lot like me.”

  “Yeah.” The boy reasoned. “And that we both have the same name.”

  “That’s gonna be a problem.” Ashton frowned.

  “Why?”

  “Come on.” Ashton huffed. “Have you heard your mother scream?”

  The boy giggled. “Yeah, that would be awkward. But funny.”

  He turned up his mouth thoughtfully. “Is it okay if I called you Junior?”

  The boy shrugged. “It would most definitely lessen the confusion. How about JR?” He lifted up his head with excitement. “I like JR.”

  Ashton nodded, impressed. “I like JR too. Shall we make it official?” He put out his hand.

  The boy looked down at it and then took it with a smile. “Okay.” He shook his hand. But then he grew silent again, playing with a pen on his mother’s desk. “Does this mean you’re staying?” he asked slowly.

  Ashton gulped. “It’s too early to say right now. I mean it’s complicated. I have a job back home.” And a fiancée, he added quietly.

  The boy nodded and continued to fiddle with the pen.

  “But I can stay two weeks with you.” He encouraged, hoping to lift his mood.

  “Yeah,” the boy answered broodingly.

  His heart hurt and he wanted to do everything he could to take away his pain.

  “For now, let’s try not focus on when I will go.” He offered. “We’ll take it a day at a time and who knows in two weeks things will change.”

  “I don’t think they will.” The boy sighed. “It’s okay. I’ll understand if you have to go. Do you have a family back where you come from?”

  “Philadelphia? No. My family lives in Bennett. That’s where I met your mom.”

  “Yeah, I know where that is. My Uncle Marshall lives there. He visits us a couple of times in the year. I haven’t been there though.”

  His jaw tensed. “Yes, both your mom’s and my family are there. They’re your family too, you know. And someday, I’d really want to take you to meet your grandparents and your aunt.”

  The boy grew quiet again. Ashton could tell a lot was going through his young mind, trying to come to terms with the factors that will most possibly change his life.

  “My friend, William tells me his parents keep fighting over him. His mom and dad separated a year ago.” The boy bit his lower lip. “Dad…,” he said slowly.

  He was addressing him! Ashton looked up in surprise at the boy, doing his best to not reveal how teary he was feeling inside. The word sounded foreign to him, but his heart was enveloped with sudden warmth, knowing that it felt more right than ever.

  “You and Mom… you’re not going to fight, right?” the boy asked.

  Ashton scrambled for words. He didn’t want to lie to him. But the truth was more difficult to explain. He didn’t live in Pay… Poy…Puy… whatever this town was called. His life was back in Philadelphia. But there was no way he was going to give up on his child either.

  “We are never going to fight over you.” He promised, crossing his fingers secretly.

  ****

  Christy wrung her fingers nervously, wondering if her son was taking it well. Finally, she heard a light chuckle from inside her office and she realized that it was Ash. She did not know whether to be relieved or worried. While she wanted her son to be happy that he’d found his father, she was afraid that he would become too attached and leave her to live with Ashton.

  “No,” she whispered to herself. “I should be glad. This is good for Ash.”

  She clenched her fist tightly to settle her nerves and knocked on the door. She wanted to know… no, she needed to know what the laughter was all about.

  She turned the door knob and stepped into her study. “Is everything alright?” she asked, her eyes keenly running over her son’s face. “Ash?”

  The boy smiled. “It’s JR now, Mom. Dad said it would be confusin
g if we were called by the same name.”

  “JR?” She looked up at Ashton questioningly.

  “You like it, Mom?” the boy asked eagerly, seeking his mother’s approval.

  “Do you?” she tried to smile.

  “I chose it,” he replied proudly.

  “It’s nice. I like it,” she said, hoping to make him happy. “Is that why you were laughing?”

  “Well, yeah,” JR grinned. “And because of some other things.”

  “Like?”

  The boy shrugged. “Just stuff. Can I go now? I really want to watch something on TV. Don’t wanna miss it.”

  “Umm… yes,” she said, slightly hurt from her son’s secrecy on not sharing their jokes with her.

  The boy scrambled out of his chair and darted towards the door before his mother could change her mind. He turned abruptly at the door though, giving his new-found father a broad smile. “You will stay, right? We’ve got rooms available. He can stay, Mom, can he?”

  “We’ll have to talk about that first, Ash.” Christy trembled.

  “I’ll stay.” Ashton added quickly. “You go catch your show and I will talk it over with your mother.”

  The boy disappeared out the door, leaving his perplexed mother glaring at her long- lost husband.

  “What do you think you’re doing?” she snarled. “You can’t stay. You know very well you can’t stay.”

  “And why not?” Ashton challenged her. “You heard the boy. There are rooms available.”

  “That’s not the point! You can’t just force yourself into his life. You will have to gradually introduce yourself into it. You’ll hurt him at this pace!”

  “Don’t you think we’re a little too late for a gradual introduction? The boy is ten years old for god sakes.” He glanced harshly at her. “I missed out on his early years, Christy, and I shall never forgive you for that.”

  She paled. “I was afraid. You’ve got to understand that.”

  “The only thing I understand is that I have a son who barely knows me. You should be glad I’m not taking this further than I should. I’m only willing to settle this because I don’t want my son suffering as a result of your stupidity.”

  “Stupidity?! Have you not heard-?”

  “I haven’t finished!” He snapped back. “I’m staying here for two weeks - with him. If there isn’t a room, make one. I’m not going anywhere without spending time with Ash. I don’t care how you feel about it and I certainly don’t care to share your opinions on it. You’re not my concern. Making sure that I get that time with Ashton is the least you can do for me after hiding him away from me all these years!”

  *****

  She collapsed onto a stool in the kitchen.

  “What am I going to do, Margaret?” Christy croaked, almost bursting into tears.

  The older, graying woman sat quietly beside her, putting a comforting arm around her.

  “It’s done,” Margaret said softly. “There’s nothing more you can do about it except your best to work things out with him. On the brighter side, you don’t have to avoid him anymore. He knows now. And didn’t it turn out far better than you had expected?”

  “I’m so scared, Margaret.” She shivered. “What if he changes his mind? What if he decides to take Ash away from me?”

  “And what if nothing?” Margaret said, raising her brow. “This is the choice you made and these are the circumstances resulting from that. You’re lucky, Christy, that all he is asking for now is two weeks with his son. Give it to him the best you can. Not only for your sake, but for your son, particularly. So he would be proud of you. And if things get worse, then we’ll all deal with it together- like a family.

  She leaned onto the woman’s shoulder. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Margaret.”

  “Ssshh,” the woman whispered into her ear as she caressed her head. “That’s enough now.”

  CHAPTER 6

  Margaret heard them laughing in her living room and she guessed that the deep, hollow bass voice must belong to no other than Ashton Pryor.

  ‘“Dinner won’t be long.” she announced, interrupting them as she walked in with a tray of two mugs of hot, steaming coffee.

  She glanced over at the man seated beside her grandson. He was handsome and chiseled. She could understand why Christy had fallen for him in her teen years.

  “You must be Ashton.” She set the tray on the table and strode towards him, her hand stretched out to shake his.

  “Hello.” He smiled, taking her hand appreciatively. “I’m sorry I pounced on you so suddenly. I didn’t mean to inconvenience you.”

  “Not at all.” She ruffled the younger boy’s hair as he stood by his father proudly. “I’m glad he’s finally met you.” She took in a deep breath. “I’m Margaret Dabney. I used to own the bed and breakfast along with my husband, Evan until three years ago, when he passed away.”

  “Used to? You don’t anymore?”

  “I suppose I do, technically.” She sighed. “But Christy’s been handling it all this while, it’s almost practically hers. It would be once I’m gone.”

  “Is …” He hesitated. “Are you and Christy family?”

  “No. But she is now. And we, Dabneys are too darned protective of our families,” she said in a serious tone.

  He clearly noted the underlying warning wrapped succinctly within it.

  She smiled at the boy again. “Isn’t it so, JR?” The boy grinned and she let out a chuckle. “I will have to get used to the name.”

  “I’ll give you three days, Nan.” JR teased.

  “Three? That’s far too short,” she exclaimed, joking along with him. “A week. Deal?”

  “Yeah, okay.” He turned up his mouth in thought as he mulled over her bargain.

  “You might want to start now with the guests though. There’s a small one playing in the lobby. You might want to go introduce yourself to him- as JR.” She winked.

  His smile widened with excitement and made to move when he stopped again. “Is it okay if I go?” he asked his father.

  Ashton laughed, giving him a friendly pat on his back. “Of course, you can. Get outta here.”

  JR flew out of the living room before either of the adults could change their minds.

  “He loves making new friends. He’s never been a shy one. Even as a baby.” Margaret smiled after the boy, but then glanced up at Ashton and coughed. “I’m sorry. That was a little insensitive of me.”

  “No, that’s totally fine. I am bound to hear such sentiments. He is, after all, a great kid. I’d have to give Christy that. She has raised him well on her own. And of course, you and your husband.” He added quickly. “So thank you.”

  “There are no thanks required in being there for the people we love. It is not she who needed us. But we- her. And Ash?” She shook her head with her memories. “He is a true blessing. I’m glad my husband at least got to know that love before he passed away.”

  “Thanks for putting up with me,” Ashton said in an attempt to detract her. He could clearly see the torment in her eyes as she recalled the memories of her husband. “I know I’m taking up one of your rented rooms so I will pay for the time I do stay.”

  She walked over to the table and picked up one mug, handing it over to him. “I thought we could sit and talk for a while since you will now be an integral part of Ash’s life. You must have some questions you want answered and perhaps I could help you with some of them.”

  He took the mug appreciatively, loving the heat of the hot coffee warming his hands.

  “If you say you’re not related, how is it that Christy knows you? I don’t remember any Dabney back in Bennett,” he started, hoping he wasn’t being too intrusive.

  She settled into a couch chair. There was still a little light left in the horizon, outlining the peak of Mount Rainier.

  “I remember sitting right here about this same time when we received that fated call from Megan Eddings. Christy had fled to Los Angeles after she lef
t the hotel. Her mother had given her some cash and she had assumed she could pull it through if she found herself a job. She was tired of her miserable life back in Bennett and you didn’t seem to have made it any easier on her. She must have thought it would just make it easier on everyone if she simply removed herself from their lives. But most of all, she did it for Marshall. She didn’t want to bring more trouble to their marriage which would very likely be once your sister learned of your marriage to Christy.” She took in a deep breath. “She was a mess- that poor child. So many mature problems for a girl as young as she was. Life was so unfair to her. She hung about subway stations and dingy motels the first few days and then she found a job as a waitress. It was at one of those small truck stop restaurants. The work was hard and the pay was little. But she is always so proud of that first paycheck she received. She finally was beginning to think she was going to make it after all. And then she missed her first period and she grew worried. She held onto hope and waited for the next. But when that didn’t come, it broke her heart. Just when she was making something of herself, she was faced with yet another obstacle. It was one she wouldn’t climb over so easily though. She was pregnant and for a woman struggling on her own, the easiest choice she had was to drop it. But Christy…” She shook her head. “Well, Christy is Christy. Abortion didn’t come easy to her. She loves babies and kids. In her desperation, she called Megan Eddings, the only woman in her life who made sense. I was a school teacher a long long time ago and Megan was one of my past students. And even after graduating high school, for some odd reason, Megan and I… we had always stayed connected. She knew Evan and I needed help with the B & B, so she suggested taking in Christy for a little while. I was always a softy when it came to troubled girls. Must have been a habit I carried from my teaching days.” Her eyes lowered as she grew quiet briefly. “I couldn’t turn my back on Christy once I heard her story. Evan and I thought we’d keep her until the baby was born and a little more- just enough time to get Christy back on her feet. But it wasn’t surprising that we gradually got attached to her and then her child. We never had kids of our own, so I guess it became very easy for us to get attached so quickly.”