A Jar of Dreams Read online

  A Jar of Dreams

  PUBLISHED BY:

  Clarissa Cartharn

  Copyright © Text Clarissa Cartharn 2015

  Copyright © Cover design Cyma Rizwaan Khan 2015

  Amazon Edition

  This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to amazon.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

  A JAR OF DREAMS

  CLARISSA CARTHARN

  He was the assassin running for his life and she was the blind refuge who gave him reason to stop

  When Eric Tanner, an assassin, is targeted to be murdered by his former employer, he seeks refuge in the house of a blind woman, Anne Mullen.

  Eric knows how to live in silence. He’s done it all his life. So when he discovers Anne is blind and living on her own, he thinks this would be his perfect hideout.

  But then he makes the mistake of his life. He forms an attachment to her. And for a man in his profession, such attachments are a weakness. Now, he must do everything he can to protect Anne from the world he’s come from.

  CONTENTS

  CHAPTER 1

  CHAPTER 2

  CHAPTER 3

  CHAPTER 4

  CHAPTER 5

  CHAPTER 6

  CHAPTER 7

  CHAPTER 8

  CHAPTER 9

  CHAPTER 10

  CHAPTER 11

  CHAPTER 12

  CHAPTER 13

  CHAPTER 14

  CHAPTER 15

  CHAPTER 16

  CHAPTER 17

  CHAPTER 18

  CHAPTER 19

  CHAPTER 20

  CHAPTER 21

  CHAPTER 22

  CHAPTER 23

  ALSO BY CLARISSA CARTHARN

  AFFAIRS & ATONEMENT

  CHAPTER 1

  CHAPTER 1

  “Hey, Ricky!” shouted out an eighteen year old boy as he goose-stepped his basketball opponent. “This way! Come on, man!”

  Eric dribbled the ball, darting a quick glance at Jamal. He made to dash with the ball towards the basketball hoop and then cunningly shot it over to Jamal. Cries mingled with cheers as Jamal raced over to shoot, skillfully dribbling the ball between and about him.

  Eric took deep rapid breaths as he tiredly placed his hands on his hips, watching his friend take the glory of shooting yet another goal for the team. There was something about Jamal that told him he would get far into being just the poor homeboy playing on rugged community basketball courts.

  His eyes caught sight of a girl across the courts. Her long golden curls fluttered in the breeze as she stood watching them from the other side of the street. He didn’t think he had ever seen her before. He smiled shyly. He would definitely have remembered her if he had. How could anyone forget those beautiful sharp features and blonde locks? She seemed a dream plucked out of a fairytale book. She didn’t belong to a city like Camden, New Jersey.

  Even at a distance, he could feel her eyes peeled keenly on the boys playing on the courts. Who was she interested in? Jamal? A sudden pang of jealousy speared through his heart. It felt strange. He had never been jealous of his best friend. Not even when his school coach picked Jamal over him to play for their school team. Was he being too petty?

  He wondered if he should go and talk to her. Perhaps, a conversation with her would heal the wound he felt inside of him. Perhaps, talking to her would lift her mysteriousness. Hell, he might even discover she is unlikeable and just another dumb, blonde chick with too much time to spend on herself and none at all for anyone else.

  He threaded his fingers through his hair. Who was he kidding? He needed courage to speak to a girl like her. The way she looked, she could most possibly be the most popular chick in high school. And he, Eric Tanner, had yet to catch the eye of any popular girl at all. The only reason he had even scored dates with Bree Hadden and Diane Farnum was because their friend, Hayley Bradberry needed to double-date with Jamal.

  “Hey! Did you see that?” Jamal swung an excited arm over his shoulders.

  “What?” Eric asked, hesitantly breaking his gaze away from the girl.

  “You didn’t see that?” Jamal said with disbelief. “That thing I did? On the hoops… like this.” He re-enacted his winning shot.

  Eric nodded, glancing to and fro between Jamal and the girl. What if she never came back? I would never know. I should take my chance.

  “Where are you, man? You ain’t even listenin’,” Jamal complained. “You okay?”

  “Yeah, yeah.” He shook his head. He had to face it. He simply didn’t have it in him to strike a random conversation with a strange and beautiful girl. And if he asked Jamal to do the deed, there was likelihood he would lose her to him. Not that Jamal was to blame. Jamal just had that charisma he would probably never have.

  “There’s something wrong, is there? Someone do something?” Jamal asked seriously, his brow frowning with concern.

  “No, no, I just-” He stopped short, his eyes narrowing, focusing angrily on the three boys gathered around the girl.

  “What is it, Ricky?” Jamal asked, noticing his sudden change. He turned to find out what had invoked that anger inside him. “Those boys?”

  Eric didn’t answer, observing them closely. His feet moved involuntarily towards the girl. But when she fell to the pavement, he sprinted out of the court with Jamal racing after him.

  “Eric, don’t get involved!” Jamal warned.

  I already am. He pressed his lips tightly and closed in on the boys. “Hey, get away from her!” he screamed, his fists clenched together with rage.

  They looked over at him and laughed.

  “Stay out of our business, white boy,” one said with a nasty grin.

  Eric glanced down at the girl whimpering on the craggy and dirty pavement and her humiliation incensed him. But they were three boys and he was just one. He needed to be smart.

  “Leave her alone,” he said, raising his palms up in submission. “I don’t want any trouble. She’s just a girl. You don’t need to do this, man.”

  “Is she your girl?”

  “No,” he said cautiously.

  “Well then, what are you so worked-up about? We’re just having some fun.”

  “Yeah, fuck off,” said another. “It ain’t your business.”

  He stepped forward stubbornly. “I’m not going anywhere. Leave her alone.”

  “Oh, yeah yeah.” The leader smirked. “I get you. You’re trying to impress the girl. But, you see, I saw her first. So I get to play with her first.”

  “You’re such a nasty piece of work, Denzel,” Jamal said from behind Eric. “Does Denzel Washington know you fucking up his reputable name? He might sue you.”

  “It ain’t my fault if my momma loves Denzel Washington.”

  Jamal clicked his tongue. “Boy, Denzel, if you are as bad as this now, I hate to see you when you’re all grown up.”

  Denzel clenched his teeth and made to charge at him.

  “Hold on there,” Jamal warned, waving his phone at Denzel. “I just called the cops. They will be here anytime soon.”

  “I don’t believe you,” the boy minced menacingly.

  “It’s your choice.” Jamal shrugged nonchalantly.

  Denzel shifted uneasily and with uncertainty.

  “Jamal! Ricky! You guys okay?” one boy called out from the edge of the courts.

  A group of people had gathered behind him, watching them intently.

  “You sure you want to t
ake on all of us?” Jamal sneered.

  Denzel backed away. “I’ll see you again, white boy.” He waved his finger threateningly at Eric.

  Eric watched him walk away before rushing over to the girl.

  “Are you okay?” he asked.

  The girl was sobbing, scrambling on her hands and knees.

  “Hey, it’s fine now,” he said softly. “They’re gone now. Here.” He offered his hand to help her up but she continued to cry, crawling about the path.

  He frowned curiously.

  “What’s going on?” asked Jamal, watching the girl with as much inquisitiveness.

  “Here, let me help you up.” Eric bent down and touched her back lightly.

  She flailed her hands at him, and cowered from him. “Don’t touch me,” she growled. “Don’t touch me!”

  Her face was directed at them, but her eyes weren’t focused, wandering aimlessly between him and Jamal.

  Jamal crept low and waved his hands before her. She didn’t react.

  “She can’t see,” he mouthed silently at Eric.

  Eric glanced up at her deep green eyes. He didn’t care that she was blind. She was beautiful. And her eyes were gorgeous. They were clear as the sea would be on a calm day. He wanted nothing more but to drown in them if he could.

  “We are here to help you,” he said softly again. “Those boys who tried to hurt you… they’ve gone.”

  “Who are you?” she asked with a tremble in her voice.

  Eric paused. He was never easy at introductions. Especially when he was as attracted as he was now to her.

  “I’m Jamal,” Jamal said quickly. “And this here… I mean, the guy sitting next to you…”

  She let out a snort. “You know I’m blind.”

  “Uh…,” Jamal hesitated.

  “Is it okay if I touch you to help you up?” Eric asked. “What’s your name?”

  “Anne… Anne Mullen.”

  He put his hands around her waist and she clutched onto his shirt as she stood up. Her breasts brushed against his torso and he stilled. Her breath lingered on his neck and the warmth of her hands burned through his flesh when she touched him.

  “Thank you,” she said.

  “It’s… it’s nothing,” he gulped nervously.

  “Jamal! Ricky!” a younger boy shouted out from the courts. “Momma’s looking for you both.”

  Jamal touched Eric’s shoulder. “We have to go,” he whispered.

  Eric didn’t move, reluctant to leave her side.

  “Ricky…,” Jamal said again. “Let’s go.”

  A middle aged woman came running wildly down the streets, screaming at them. “Get away from her! Get away or I’ll call the cops!”

  Eric stepped back from Anne immediately. “We were only trying to help.”

  “Yeah, sure you were. I know the likes of you sort. You see a helpless girl and then you want to take advantage of her.”

  “We better go, Ricky,” Jamal said in a low, anxious voice.

  “No, it isn’t anything like that, Lucy,” Anne said. “They were really only trying to help.”

  “You don’t know these… these people,” Lucy spat out. “If only you could see… They’re filthy scums of the street…”

  “I think it is time we go, Ricky,” Jamal said loud and sternly, glaring at the woman.

  “No, wait! Wait!” Anne let out, clutching desperately onto Eric’s shirt. “Let me at least see you.”

  “Anne!” Lucy said, shocked by her request.

  “I know what I am doing, Lucy. Will you for godsakes stop treating me like a child?!” Anne growled.

  “Ricky!” Jamal urged.

  “Please,” she said, turning towards Eric. “Let me see you or I’d forever wonder who it was that helped me today.”

  “But how?” Eric asked, slightly baffled.

  “Bend down so I can feel your face.”

  He lowered his head. She reached for his face and ran her fingers, feeling the curves and contours of his face. She brought her lips close to his and he held his breath for the fear that he might kiss her. He closed his eyes, trying to pretend she was anywhere but close to him. Instead, her fingers branded him, leaving a trail of heat as they moved over his face.

  “Thanks,” she said with a smile as she stepped back.

  “Ricky!” Jamal called out again.

  Eric gave her one last look and then jogged to catch-up to Jamal, who was already hastily heading back home.

  Eric had been living with the Irvines since he had been nine years old. His father had died when he had been five and his mother passed away four years later. Despite being a single mother, Leticia Irvine had welcomed him with open arms into her family of three children- Jamal, Aaliyah and her youngest, Jada.

  Eric had always been Leticia’s second son since the day he was born. Having been his mother’s best friend, it had only been natural that she had shared his mother’s grief, and finally, her burden when she died from cancer. She adopted him.

  He gave one last look in the mirror and sighed. What was he doing? Anne Mullen… Anne Mullen, he chanted under his breath as if he was trying to memorize her name. He was attracted to her despite her blindness. Jamal would think he had lost his mind.

  He fingered the loose long strands of his hair that fell down his face. He might as well see her and get over this strange attraction. After only a few quick questions with the regulars on that street, he had discovered there was a private tutor for the blind who resided in one of the apartments on that block. He supposed that Anne was probably attending a lesson with her. But what had she been doing standing alone and without that crazy Lucy woman?

  “Where you off to all glamored up like that?” Jamal said, strolling in on him.

  “Nowhere,” Eric said, preferring not to reveal his strange fascination for the Mullen girl.

  “You sure?” Jamal grinned. “Do you have a date or something I dunno about?”

  Eric waved him off. “I’m just going out for a bit and will be back soon. Will you tell Momma?”

  “Yeah, sure.” Jamal frowned.

  He was suspicious, Eric noted. He should be. Jamal knew everything there was to know about him. Except this. Except about Anne Mullen.

  He stood waiting by the door of the apartment building of Anne’s tutor. He counted down the minutes. The way he hung about the steps, someone would have thought he was a drug peddler. He certainly could tell that that was exactly what a few women had thought of him as they walked past him.

  Finally, at a little over half-past three, Anne emerged, tapping her white cane as she walked by. He didn’t recall her carrying one yesterday. His gaze fell on her long golden locks that sparkled in the sunlight. Her skin was so fair; he’d thought she would burn in the heat of the afternoon sun.

  She stopped a little away from him and then turned towards him, her face tilted as if she was focusing on something. Did she know he was there? But she turned away again and resumed her walk down the path.

  He followed her quietly at a distance, keeping watch over her. He still didn’t have the courage to make conversation with her. Until he did, he would at least make sure she reached home safely. Where was Lucy by the way?

  Anne stopped at the spot she was harassed yesterday, facing the basketball courts again. A smile twitched at her lips. She was listening to the excited cheers and jeers of the players, he realized. That was why she had been standing there yesterday too.

  He leaned against the wall of a building, watching her. Not long after, Lucy came rushing down the pavement and he quickly lowered his head in case she recognized him.

  “I’m here, Anne,” she called out as she neared her. “Are you okay? Did anyone bother you today?”

  “No, Lucy,” Anne answered tiredly. “I am fine. Is the car here now to take me home?”

  “It’s on its way. Really, this craziness has got to stop, Anne. First you insist on hiring a middle-class tutor to teach you Braille. And then this wretched walk you
insist on taking. Now this … this damn fascination for basketball,” she stammered with frustration. “You were lucky yesterday those boys didn’t harm you. If only you’d let me come a little early, they wouldn’t have bothered you like that.”

  “I need to start being independent, Lucy. I’m eighteen now. I can’t continue living with my parents.”

  “That’s absurd! Of course you will have to live with them. Honey, how are you ever going to take care of yourself on your own?”

  “I absolutely can. I will show it to you, Lucy. One day, I will.” She lifted her chin defiantly.

  “You are so stubborn sometimes.” Lucy shook her head disappointedly. “And foolish too. Like deciding not to use your cane yesterday.”

  “I wanted to see if people would react differently to me if they didn’t know I was blind.” Anne smiled.

  Lucy sighed. “And what did you discover?”

  “Lucy, they didn’t! I knew the route and the exact number of steps to take to get here. And of course, I had my dark glasses on so there was no way they could have found out. How do you think they could have known?”

  “Honey, it can’t have been all that easy,” Lucy insisted. “Surely, they must have had an inkling of some sort…”

  “I know when they’re staring, Lucy. I can feel it. They didn’t yesterday. Even if they did, it was nice just pretending I wasn’t blind. That… I could see again.” Her voice trailed off sadly.

  Lucy rubbed her arm tenderly. “I know, honey. I know.”

  A dark car drew alongside the curb and Lucy helped Anne into it.

  Eric watched the car veer back into the traffic and disappear down the road. His heart thumped heavily against his chest. She had touched him in a way no one ever had. But he knew now they were worlds apart. There was no possible way she would be allowed to be with him. Probably he had confused love with empathy, he consoled himself. Perhaps, he was attracted to her vulnerability. He felt sorry for her and he wanted to always make sure she would be fine.

  Flashes of his mom struggling into her wheelchair raced through his memory. He remembered how he would prepare her breakfast, feed her; help her take her medicine. She would cry as he would hold her. She cried for the unknown- who would take care of him, who would love him as much as she did and who would spoil him. And every day, he would assure her that he would be fine and that he was big enough to take care of himself. Inside, he had always been just as afraid as she was.